One evening when I was a junior in high school, merely a child, I had a particularly haunting experience. I had just arrived for my regular shift as a checker at the grocery store. I noticed that my manager and co-workers were looking at me very strangely, and I immediately thought I had done something wrong and was about to be fired. It turns out, they had all heard some news that obviously I hadn’t. They had this very careful way about them, and were on pins and needles, treating me as if I were a fine piece of china. It turns out, they had all thought that my sister was killed in a car accident that evening, and that I hadn’t yet heard the news. When my boss told me, I immediately ran like mad to the department store in the same strip mall, where my sister was supposed to be working. I asked if she was there...thank Goodness she was! She said she had just heard the same about me! Neither one of us was in an accident that evening, but several other students from our school were. It was a very serious accident...alcohol-related...and only one of five students survived the crash. The only survivor happened to be a boy I had a serious crush on in the seventh grade. One of the victims was the boyfriend of a gal I worked with at the grocery store. How did people think my sister or I were involved? The only thing I can think of is that one of the victims’ names was similar to my sister’s....and then, rumors get started and go from there.
I wasn’t a victim in this accident, but, I admit, I had been to a few keg parties while in high school. Of course, I had to “convince” others, and especially myself that I was “cool.” (Mostly, I just sipped on the same cup the whole evening...but, who knew?) I’m fortunate that my parents did things very well as we were growing up to instill certain values in us. But, they didn’t hover over us and there was plenty of opportunity, if we wanted, to abuse. For the most part, we were careful kids and didn’t go overboard. Other times, we had guardian angels watching over us and were able to escape disaster. But, there is no room for error. We learned that more than ever that evening the carload of students was killed. What a horrible nightmare for anyone, not to mention the mere children we were.
Now, as parents, we can do our best to teach our children the dangers of drugs and alcohol. Teachers can do their part as well, as can the community. I am very concerned for my child’s safety every time he leaves the house. I do my best to make sure he will not be the one to abuse drugs and alcohol. I started teaching him early on. But, that alone doesn’t guarantee his safety. In his case, right now I am more concerned about him being hurt by someone else who is drinking. We need to educate our youth to also educate others. It needs to be a universal effort.
Yes, alcohol abuse can cause serious damage to ourselves and others, but not just in a physical sense. It can lead to arrests and jail time, which will affect a person for the rest of their lives. It is nearly impossible to get a professional job after an incident such as this, no matter how much you have changed. I know. My brother, now in his 50's, and a very sharp degreed individual, who once worked in a very professional capacity, has experienced this. He didn’t abuse as a teen, but he did as a young adult, and it eventually caught up with him. Who knows how he ended up in this situation, when his four sisters managed to escape this fate? It could have to do with the fact that alcoholism was in the family. Our grandfather died from alcoholism when we were small children. Our mother had to miss her childhood, because she had to be a grown-up while her dad abused alcohol. I remember when I was a child, my mom giving my grandfather cash when we dropped him off at his home. And, I remember her comment afterward. “I hope he doesn’t go out and spend it on a bottle.” His alcoholism definitely affected the entire family in one way or another.
Thankfully, things are looking up for my brother. But, it takes support. And, it takes education. Early education on a consistent basis could prevent so many of our youth from ever having to experience this disease for themselves. We must educate our youth so they can live their lives to the fullest and become the individuals and citizens we know they can be.
--- Rene Schlimm, Chandler